Learn to Love Your Goals

Image may contain: text that says '"We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence then, is not an act, but a habit." -Aristotle'Goals. We all have them. And some of them we even meet.

My relationship with goals tends to be love/hate. It’s a relationship. It starts full of hope and enthusiasm. Then the realization that things are not so perfect. Then the decision of trying to salvage it or moving forward.

Listen, Goal, it’s not you. It’s me. 

That’s what I figured out this morning.

It’s me.

When I set a goal, I continuously measure how close I am to the end. If it’s weight, I’m on that scale every day. And God forbid if I’ve done everything right and I gain. It’s clearly not working. Why am I doing this? And then the breakup.

What I am starting to focus on is the process. The habits that will get me to the goal.

Instead of the tired goal of “I want to lose 20 lbs by September.” My goal should be that I want 80% of my meals to be healthy. Come on. I’m human. 

This works for any goal you want to set. Why? Because you have control. Sometimes it may not feel like it but your goals should reflect what you have control over.

Having trouble at work? Maybe your goal is to have a sit down with your supervisor to discuss how things could be changed to better suit you and your company. Or maybe it can’t be fixed and your goal is to update and send out your resume to five companies a week. Or better yet, maybe your goal is to start doing research on starting your own company. The ultimate in control.

Financial goals? You may have more control over how much you spend and save than you think. Your goal could be to create and stick to a budget. It could be to think about your many many talents and create a side hustle to bring in more money.

Fitness goal? Set a goal of going to the gym, a fitness class or walking with a friend every day. You will be surprised at how quickly your body responds and how much happier and less stressed you feel.

My goals, now, are daily goals and reflect the process more than the outcome. This way the frustration we all experience won’t derail me from what I want to accomplish.

There are a lot of things outside of our control. But we have to be honest and know that we have a lot more influence over our lives then, sometimes we care to believe. If we don’t believe, then the responsibility of meeting our goals lies somewhere else. Not our fault.
But on the flip side, no results.

Setting short-term, bite-sized goals that get you to an ultimate goal is one way of taking back all of that power and gives you those little wins along the way. Celebration after celebration. Soon it’s a habit and soon after that, a lifestyle.

And to my Dear Goals, I think we are good. I think I’ve worked through things. Thank you for always giving me space when I need it and taking me back. I’m glad we are together for the duration. #HappyFix#SelfCare.