The Hardest and Best Kind of Love

Image may contain: textLoving unconditionally. Some days it feels hard.
Relationships are messy. They require work. Sometimes a lot of it.
They require that you are willing to do hard things for the people you love. Sometimes it means risking their love by saying or doing something that may make them uncomfortable, angry or worse, turn them away from you.
But when you love someone unconditionally, that’s what you do. You do the best you know how.
Loving others unconditionally, though, is freeing. It’s a blessing. Regardless of what people say or do, you love them. Parents and children. Husbands and wives. Sisters and brothers. Family and friends.
All of these people, in my life, I love without reservation. Without expectation. Without exception.
Without anything but purity of feeling that I didn’t know was possible when I was younger.
Loving unconditionally doesn’t mean that relationships are all wine and roses. That there are never bumps in the road. That there are no disagreements or misunderstanding. That there are no mistakes or missteps. It just means that you love through them.
It means that even when we argue or doubt, we still love.
Here’s a question. If we can love others that fiercely, why can’t we love ourselves in that same way?
Why can we not extend the grace and forgiveness we give those we love unconditionally to ourselves? Why do we berate, criticize and ruminate on all of the things that we’ve done wrong? Why is it so hard to stop sabotaging ourselves in our quest to do what’s best, you know that thing that will move us forward?
Loving unconditionally does not mean settling. It does not mean suffering through abuse. It does not mean continually putting yourself in the back seat and letting others drive the relationship. Or, for that matter, letting the stories we tell ourselves drive our futures.
It means being confident both in relationships and in ourselves. That when things seem to be heading in the wrong direction, you figure out how to make it right and take that course of action.
It means that if you give love unconditionally to others, you must extend that kind of love to yourself.
Loving unconditionally can give you the highest high, and bring you to your knees. But if it’s true, it’s worth slogging through the rough patches to the sunshine. Just make sure that if you are generous with love to others, you are at least that giving of it to yourself. #HappyFix #SelfCare